It's Friday. It's jeans day. I'm having lunch with my best friend in the world. These are fantastic things. You'd think that would be all I needed today to make it awesome, but I find myself still searching for something else to make me happy.
I prayed hard last night for my friends Greg and Heather as they grieve for their little girl. I think their loss has effected me greater than I realized. Maybe it's that I feel guilty trying to laugh and have a good day knowing they are in so much pain. Maybe it's that I keep looking at Ella and feel a little guilty because it worked out for us. When Ella gives me a kiss or laughs so hard her face turns red, I feel sad for them because they don't have their little girl. I can't imagine their pain and to be honest, I don't want to ever have to feel that much anguish.
So I look at the pile of work stacked on my floor that I need to accomplish today and I can't even bring myself to pick a job up off the floor to even look at it. I wanna go home. I want to squeeze on Ella and have Adam hold me and tell me we'll always be happy. I want to watch a funny movie and not have any worry. I want these same feelings for Greg and Heather.
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